Thursday, March 18, 2010
Monday, March 1, 2010
Workin' 9 to 5.
Yeah, that would have been fun if I actually was just working 9 to 5 today.
In all reality, I worked 6am - 8pm.
Remember those "time keeping software issues" back from the disaster of a day I like to call February 26, 2010 You Suck Ass And I Hope You Never Repeat Yourself As Long As We Both Shall Work (or as long as I shall work, because apparently you don't care if you EVER work again, timekeeping software from hell.).. Well, that day reappeared in a much prettier fashion... Timekeeping Software was still broken, and eating a 5 pound tub of Twizzlers was much more appealing than a trek on the treadmill.
You understand right?
Yeah, you probably don't. You're probably much more dedicated to the undersoles of your shoes and the sound they make when connecting to the upside of a treadmill belt that is running full speed ahead.
Look, I'm not a train engine, leave me alone!
And YES, I realize I gave up sweets for Lent. But really, after I made a grown man cry with the obsurd & cruel things that came out of my mouth, I figured my soul (and tummy) needed some re-sweetening up. Do you atleast understand that? Again, probably not. Whatever. ;)
Hugs,
Karla
In all reality, I worked 6am - 8pm.
Remember those "time keeping software issues" back from the disaster of a day I like to call February 26, 2010 You Suck Ass And I Hope You Never Repeat Yourself As Long As We Both Shall Work (or as long as I shall work, because apparently you don't care if you EVER work again, timekeeping software from hell.).. Well, that day reappeared in a much prettier fashion... Timekeeping Software was still broken, and eating a 5 pound tub of Twizzlers was much more appealing than a trek on the treadmill.
You understand right?
Yeah, you probably don't. You're probably much more dedicated to the undersoles of your shoes and the sound they make when connecting to the upside of a treadmill belt that is running full speed ahead.
Look, I'm not a train engine, leave me alone!
And YES, I realize I gave up sweets for Lent. But really, after I made a grown man cry with the obsurd & cruel things that came out of my mouth, I figured my soul (and tummy) needed some re-sweetening up. Do you atleast understand that? Again, probably not. Whatever. ;)
Hugs,
Karla
Sunday, February 28, 2010
It's Not Delivery.... It's....
not Digornio either... but I am thinking Pizza!
Should I eat pizza or get on the treadmill?
This is where I like to make pro/con lists.
Panormous Pizza
Pro: It's pizza. Umm. Yum.
Con: It will make my ass even more A-normous!
Treadmill
Pro: It will help reduce what the Panormous Pizza has done to my ass.
Con: It's not pizza.
I mean really, after reading the pros and cons, there was no more contemplation.. the words decided for me! Pizza it is! Seriously, what if pizza goes out of circulation tomorrow? I'll be pretty damn sorry that I didn't get one last taste! The treadmill appears to be fairly stationary. ;)
Should I eat pizza or get on the treadmill?
This is where I like to make pro/con lists.
Panormous Pizza
Pro: It's pizza. Umm. Yum.
Con: It will make my ass even more A-normous!
Treadmill
Pro: It will help reduce what the Panormous Pizza has done to my ass.
Con: It's not pizza.
I mean really, after reading the pros and cons, there was no more contemplation.. the words decided for me! Pizza it is! Seriously, what if pizza goes out of circulation tomorrow? I'll be pretty damn sorry that I didn't get one last taste! The treadmill appears to be fairly stationary. ;)
Saturday, February 27, 2010
The Heart of a Bear!
Workout 1 - REDO! Brisk five-minute warm up walk. Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.
3:13:00pm - Start!
3:18:00pm - Walk briskly for 5 minutes, complete. Silver Star (3.00MPH.)
3:19:00pm - Run for 60 seconds, done. Gold Star (5.00MPH is good enough for me, and Bobby McGee!)
3:20:30pm - Walk for 90 seconds, bingo. Gold Star (2.00MPH)
3:20:50pm - Breathing really hard. Wheezing. Sweating.
3:21:30pm - Run for 60 seconds, achieve! Gold Star. (5.00MPH)
3:23:00pm - Walk for 90 seconds, conclude. Gold Star. (2.00MPH)
3:23:40pm - Hurts to breath. Want to curse. Want to cry. Maybe I am? I can't see.... Sweat (or tears? Maybe it's blood!?) in eyes.
3:23:50pm - The devil is camping out in my lungs building a bonfire.. Lungs burn!
3:24:00pm - Run for 60 seconds, annihilated! Gold Freaking Star. (5.00MPH)
3:25:30pm - You're effing crazy if you think I'm increasing the speed past 2.00MPH, you know what.. just to show you how serious I am, I'm dropping the speed to 1.80MPH.
3:26:30pm - Imagine a bear chasing you and you'll run faster? I'll be damned if that's true! I make a mean porridge, you moron! Eff off.
3:26:59pm - I give up. You win.
I ate Cheerios for lunch. Pretty sure those will counter-balance the heart attack looming from the extra weight I have settled around my midsection.
3:13:00pm - Start!
3:18:00pm - Walk briskly for 5 minutes, complete. Silver Star (3.00MPH.)
3:19:00pm - Run for 60 seconds, done. Gold Star (5.00MPH is good enough for me, and Bobby McGee!)
3:20:30pm - Walk for 90 seconds, bingo. Gold Star (2.00MPH)
3:20:50pm - Breathing really hard. Wheezing. Sweating.
3:21:30pm - Run for 60 seconds, achieve! Gold Star. (5.00MPH)
3:23:00pm - Walk for 90 seconds, conclude. Gold Star. (2.00MPH)
3:23:40pm - Hurts to breath. Want to curse. Want to cry. Maybe I am? I can't see.... Sweat (or tears? Maybe it's blood!?) in eyes.
3:23:50pm - The devil is camping out in my lungs building a bonfire.. Lungs burn!
3:24:00pm - Run for 60 seconds, annihilated! Gold Freaking Star. (5.00MPH)
3:25:30pm - You're effing crazy if you think I'm increasing the speed past 2.00MPH, you know what.. just to show you how serious I am, I'm dropping the speed to 1.80MPH.
3:26:30pm - Imagine a bear chasing you and you'll run faster? I'll be damned if that's true! I make a mean porridge, you moron! Eff off.
3:26:59pm - I give up. You win.
I ate Cheerios for lunch. Pretty sure those will counter-balance the heart attack looming from the extra weight I have settled around my midsection.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Eatercise!
So.. I just had a big ole workout on my jaw. Yep. Had the BEST DINNER EVER (a Vegetarian Big Mac (grilled cheese with pickle slices and thousand island dressing)) in place of the workout I was supposed to do last night and TONIGHT!
Looks like I'm right on course.........
for 5k runnin' disaster. ;)
Forecast is calling for me to head back into work after a while, and truth be told, I would rather have please my tummy over that God forsaken treadmill.
Surely I can't put off exercising forever.. .......
Or can I? (Guess you'll have to check back and see!)
Looks like I'm right on course.........
for 5k runnin' disaster. ;)
Forecast is calling for me to head back into work after a while, and truth be told, I would rather have please my tummy over that God forsaken treadmill.
Surely I can't put off exercising forever.. .......
Or can I? (Guess you'll have to check back and see!)
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
There's Always Tomorrow...
... because well, I didn't quite make it to the workout tonight.
Just got off work, AND NO, it's not because I got into work late.. or even that I took an abnormally long lunch break. Everything was going like a regularly scheduled program (you know, one of the "after these messages, we'll be riiiigght back." kinda good days.) when the IT tech and I decide to run a "really quick and easy patch" for our timekeeping software.
One of the beavers musta chewed right through the dam, cause... DAAAAAmMMMMNNN did we have a mess on our hands.
We worked straight through until 9:45pm.. Okay, I (big emphasis on the I!) worked straight through. The little skinny, widget of a dude apparently thought he needed to stop to eat or he might pass out (seriously, dude weighs less than my bra!). I kid, I kid. Mad props to him for being so entertaining & helpful throughout the process that made me completely unheart our timekeeping software techs!!
So, he ran to El Quiero Taco Bell while I drank some water (I figured the least I could do was not eat.. since apparently I would be for-going my evening of treadmill torture.).
So, I'll be back tomorrow.. hopefully with the encouraging words resembling, "I kicked that workout's ass like it was my sister after she hid my Halloween candy!"
Just got off work, AND NO, it's not because I got into work late.. or even that I took an abnormally long lunch break. Everything was going like a regularly scheduled program (you know, one of the "after these messages, we'll be riiiigght back." kinda good days.) when the IT tech and I decide to run a "really quick and easy patch" for our timekeeping software.
One of the beavers musta chewed right through the dam, cause... DAAAAAmMMMMNNN did we have a mess on our hands.
We worked straight through until 9:45pm.. Okay, I (big emphasis on the I!) worked straight through. The little skinny, widget of a dude apparently thought he needed to stop to eat or he might pass out (seriously, dude weighs less than my bra!). I kid, I kid. Mad props to him for being so entertaining & helpful throughout the process that made me completely unheart our timekeeping software techs!!
So, he ran to El Quiero Taco Bell while I drank some water (I figured the least I could do was not eat.. since apparently I would be for-going my evening of treadmill torture.).
So, I'll be back tomorrow.. hopefully with the encouraging words resembling, "I kicked that workout's ass like it was my sister after she hid my Halloween candy!"
Uno Ugghho!
Workout 1 - Brisk five-minute warm up walk. Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.
Let me do a little recappage for you all....
7:55:00pm - Find shirt, sweats and socks to wear... dig in closet for workout shoes.
7:57:00pm - A little winded from that process.. not gonna lie. I'm sitting in a chair catching my breath.
8:00:00pm - Turn on treadmill, 3.20 MPH.. No problem. I OWN THIS WORKOUT!
8:05:00pm - Increase speed to 5.00 MPH.. I got this. You are my bitch, workout!
8:05:30pm - I can do this. I can do this.
8:05:58pm - Sweating & breathing heavy.
8:06:00pm - Reduce speed to 2.50 MPH. Oh how I love you sweet SLOW treadmill.
8:07:28pm - O.M.G.. It's almost time to increase speed.. I just got my breathing back to normal.
8:07:30pm - Increase speed to 5.00 MPH. Not bad.
8:07:45pm - 15 seconds down.. 60 minus 15.. how many seconds are left??
8:08:00pm - halfway done.. halfway... can't breath. must concentrate on deep breaths.
8:08:25pm - Might die. Heart hurts. Calves burning. Can't breath. Sweat in eyes.
8:08:30pm - Sweet baby of the Immaculate Mary thank you for turning the clock.. Reduce speed to 2.20 MPH. I hope this never ends...
8:09:55pm - NO! Only 5 seconds left. I.Hate.You.5.00MPH.
8:10:00pm - Increase speed to 5.00 MPH. Hard. SOOO hard to breath.
8:10:15pm - Sweat in eyes. Burns. Eyes. Calves. Heart. Lungs. EVERYTHING BURNS!
8:10:35pm - Passing out is probable. Vomiting is probable. Finishing is not likely.
8:10:55pm - Reduce speed to 2.00 MPH.8:11:00pm - Still can't breath. Reduce speed to 1.80MPH. Still not better. Want to lay down. Want lungs to stop burning.
8:12:30pm - Not ready to run again. Maybe I can walk a little longer.
8:13:30pm - Dear Devil, You win! Sweaty Snuggles, Karla.
So, that's it. The workout beat me.
I should have been walking/running until the clock struck 8:25:00pm. I was 11:30minutes shy of success.
If workout 1 had been successful, I would have waited until Friday to try again.. Apparently I need to train harder.. Tomorrow, I will own you like you're my College Temp, Workout!
Let me do a little recappage for you all....
7:55:00pm - Find shirt, sweats and socks to wear... dig in closet for workout shoes.
7:57:00pm - A little winded from that process.. not gonna lie. I'm sitting in a chair catching my breath.
8:00:00pm - Turn on treadmill, 3.20 MPH.. No problem. I OWN THIS WORKOUT!
8:05:00pm - Increase speed to 5.00 MPH.. I got this. You are my bitch, workout!
8:05:30pm - I can do this. I can do this.
8:05:58pm - Sweating & breathing heavy.
8:06:00pm - Reduce speed to 2.50 MPH. Oh how I love you sweet SLOW treadmill.
8:07:28pm - O.M.G.. It's almost time to increase speed.. I just got my breathing back to normal.
8:07:30pm - Increase speed to 5.00 MPH. Not bad.
8:07:45pm - 15 seconds down.. 60 minus 15.. how many seconds are left??
8:08:00pm - halfway done.. halfway... can't breath. must concentrate on deep breaths.
8:08:25pm - Might die. Heart hurts. Calves burning. Can't breath. Sweat in eyes.
8:08:30pm - Sweet baby of the Immaculate Mary thank you for turning the clock.. Reduce speed to 2.20 MPH. I hope this never ends...
8:09:55pm - NO! Only 5 seconds left. I.Hate.You.5.00MPH.
8:10:00pm - Increase speed to 5.00 MPH. Hard. SOOO hard to breath.
8:10:15pm - Sweat in eyes. Burns. Eyes. Calves. Heart. Lungs. EVERYTHING BURNS!
8:10:35pm - Passing out is probable. Vomiting is probable. Finishing is not likely.
8:10:55pm - Reduce speed to 2.00 MPH.8:11:00pm - Still can't breath. Reduce speed to 1.80MPH. Still not better. Want to lay down. Want lungs to stop burning.
8:12:30pm - Not ready to run again. Maybe I can walk a little longer.
8:13:30pm - Dear Devil, You win! Sweaty Snuggles, Karla.
So, that's it. The workout beat me.
I should have been walking/running until the clock struck 8:25:00pm. I was 11:30minutes shy of success.
If workout 1 had been successful, I would have waited until Friday to try again.. Apparently I need to train harder.. Tomorrow, I will own you like you're my College Temp, Workout!
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